He is Always With Us.
Over the years, family celebrations have been one of the most difficult things to deal with. Thoughts always run through my head of what it would be like if Nathan was still with us. I remember the first time we went out to dinner without him. It was to celebrate his 29th birthday, and the waitress sat us at a table with 6 chairs. But we only took up 5 of them. That 6th chair just glared at me the whole time as if to scream in my face; it was like any other deadly weapon that had the power to destroy me.
Soon it will be 13 years without Nathan’s physical presence, and I’ve gotten more used to there being just 5 of us, but those same thoughts still fill my mind — every single time.
November 2nd was Justin’s birthday. We went out to dinner and our 3 sons sat on the other side of the table from Rick and me. I found myself wondering what the conversation would have been like with Nathan there. When we got home, we had turtle pie and ice cream for dessert.
The following day I was eating a leftover piece of the pie, and I suddenly heard Nathan tell me that he was with us for Justin’s birthday. That he’s there for all the celebrations. He is always with us, even though we can’t see him.
I looked at the pie and the heart was unmistakable. A perfect caramel heart!
My mind drifted back to the first time Nathan took me to get a caramel macchiato. He told me they were so good I just had to try one. He soon reminded me how much he loved ice cream too, which was also there on my plate. I would buy some for him almost every time I knew he’d be stopping by.
THIS is my son. Proving to me in the most wonderful (and often humorous) ways that he is always here right by our side — with me, with his Dad, and with his 3 brothers — because love lives on for all eternity.
Happy Birthday, Justin!
(Love, Nate).
